Is it not worrisome that the Bible warns us multiple times about the dangers of the tongue, yet one of the most overlooked sins is gossip amongst believers? Unfortunately, both men and women are equally guilty of this sin. Even though gossip is commonly known as the spread of rumours or talking ill of someone, the focus of this blog will be primarily be on discussing someone’s private life in their absence.
It surely is without a doubt that I have not fully overcome this sin, however, the Lord our God has greatly worked on my heart with regards to it. Therefore, I am writing so that we can not only be convicted but inspired to be intentional about overcoming this sin of gossiping. Sometime in December, I came across an Instagram post from @withlovejillian saying, "Satan loves speculation. Gossip thrives on it. Don't allow your minds to create scenarios about your sisters in Christ. If you are so interested in knowing something, ask her." Shuu! That immediately reminded me of a moment where I myself were gossiping but disguised it as having concern about the fellow sister in Christ. However, I later came to a realisation that had it really been a genuine concern, I would have reached out to her and asked her directly to clarify. Therefore, I must admit that our supposed concern was not rooted in sincere love.
A growing trend of videos of ladies excited to literally gossip with their boyfriends or friends after someone confided in them is alarming. Due to this reason, I have grown to isolate myself and shied away from friendships including those that are supposed to be godly. It is easy for our lips to slip up and say things we should have not said, and as much as this can happen to the best of us, it has also contributed to my fear of opening up to anyone, including sisters in Christ. Godly friendships ought to be our safe spaces, however, if we do not tackle the sin of gossip head on and resent it, how can we trust our friend and ourselves?
Often times it may feel justified to discuss someone who has wronged us, we usually label this as “venting”. However, the Bible has very clear applicable ways we should use when faced with such situations. In Matthew 18:15-17, our Lord Jesus Christ commanded us to inform a brother or sister directly of their sin toward us so that they are aware and may be given a chance to repent of their sin. Therefore, it is only after they do not listen to us that we may involve one or two other believers to assist with resolving the matter without sinning. Gossip is never an option.
So far the scenarios discussed where we may easily gossip are three (3):
Gossiping out of fake concern,
Friends oversharing the business of the other friend, and lastly,
Gossiping disguised as venting.
There are many other scenarios we can discuss however, it is wise to pray to God for sensitivity towards gossip so that we may immediately be aware and convicted should we engage in any form of it. It is my prayer that other women may not feel comfortable gossiping in our presence and that we may quickly shut such a conversation. Therefore, I would like to urge you sisters to stop gossiping as none of it is harmless. People break and hurt over it and it fuels hate and envy. We ought to only be sincere in our discussions about each other. "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." (Ephesians 4:29)
Here are a few verses about gossiping, kindly check the out and meditate on them.
2 Corinthians 12:20
James 1:26; 4:11
Proverbs 10:18-19; 11:9,13; 16:28; 17:9; 18:6-8,21; 20:19, 26:20-22
Psalms 34:31, 41:7, 141:3
1 Timothy 3:9-11; 5:13-14
Yours in Christ